Why I fired my Secretary

Discussion in 'Public General Chat' started by Grumble, Apr 2, 2009.

  1. Grumble
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    Why I fired my Secretary.

    Last week was my birthday
    and I didn't feel very well
    waking up on that morning.

    I went downstairs for breakfast
    hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
    'Happy Birthday!',
    and possibly have a small present for me.

    As it turned out,
    she barely said good morning,
    let alone
    ' Happy Birthday.'

    I thought..

    Well, that's marriage for you,
    but the kids...
    They will remember.

    My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast
    and didn't say a word.
    So when I left for the office,
    I felt pretty low
    and somewhat despondent.

    As I walked into my office,
    my secretary Jane said,
    'Good Morning Boss,
    and by the way
    Happy Birthday ! '
    It felt a little better
    that at least someone had remembered.

    I worked until one o'clock ,
    when Jane knocked on my door
    and said, 'You know,
    It's such a beautiful day outside,
    and it is your Birthday,
    what do you say we go out to lunch,
    just you and me.'
    I said, 'Thanks, Jane,
    that's the greatest thing
    I've heard all day.
    Let's go !'

    We went to lunch.
    But we didn't go
    where we normally would go.
    She chose instead at a quiet bistro
    with a private table.
    We had two martinis each
    and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

    On the way back to the office,
    Jane said, 'You know,
    It's such a beautiful day...
    We don't need to go straight back to the office,
    Do We ?'

    I responded,
    'I guess not.
    What do you have in mind ?'
    She said,
    'Let's drop by my apartment,
    it's just around the corner.'

    After arriving at her apartment,
    Jane turned to me and said,
    ' Boss, if you don't mind,
    I'm going to step into the bedroom
    for just a moment.
    I'll be right back.'
    'Ok.' I nervously replied.

    She went into the bedroom and,
    after a couple of minutes,
    she came out
    carrying a huge birthday cake ...
    Followed
    by my wife,
    my kids,
    and dozens of my friends
    and co-workers,
    all singing 'Happy Birthday'.


    And I just sat there...



    On the couch...



    Naked.
     
  2. dash
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    lmfao
     
  3. Brownmccoy
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    LOL!
     
  4. Erock
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    win
     
  5. The Communist
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    That is great!
     
  6. Roch The Shaman
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    hahahahahahahah
     
  7. Rubius
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    tl;dr
     
  8. Moon
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    Hahahahaha epic fail
     
  9. The Cox
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    spoil sport.

    Took what, 45 seconds tops to read that?

    Funny as hell though.
     
  10. Ben K
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    His wife should have been the first one to suggest that holding a party in his secretary's house might not be such a good idea.
     
  11. Valindria
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    Birthday suit for a birthday party
     
  12. doctorie
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    hahahahahahaha
     
  13. Ryld Baenre
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    I didn't see that coming.

    LOL
     
  14. Moon
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    Hmmmm great concept everyone should be naked on their birthday!
     
  15. Or at least just not get in trouble for it.
     
  16. Xenzoku
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    LoL brilliant :D
     
  17. Wren
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    Great one.
     
  18. Blasphemy
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    Haha, got a good laugh to start the day, thx
     
  19. Samakar
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    Haha, that was awesome!
     
  20. Nishua
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    LOL. He tried to pull of the naked man and it failed. It only works 2 out of 3 times. <-- How I met your mother reference.