Wings [A Firefly Fanfiction] Firefly/FFVII Crossover Status: Work in Progress Current Word Count: ~12,000 Chapter One and Two http://tyloric.livejournal.com/1996.html Chapter Three http://tyloric.livejournal.com/2076.html Chapter Four http://tyloric.livejournal.com/6519.html
good start. my only comment as a firefly nerd is that River never seemed to distinguish between spoken and unspoken speech that she heard. i think it made her reactions more interesting when she didn't distinguish and certainly kept the crew on its toes as to whether or not she was hyper aware or crazy. many of the times when she did refer to the unspoken speech to the crew it was often not as a direct quote back to them, but almost as an interpretation that could have come from spying or interpretation of body language. her new confidence in speaking her mind with Mal is palpable. is this new due to her "awakening" at Mr. Universe's? personally i think one of the best River moments of psychics and psychology was in the episode Objects in Space. I feel this may be the best use of her abilities and powers without really giving them away and just looking crazy/crafty/wise and so forth.
River is a difficult character to write and the way people like to see her written is currently beyond my skills as a writer. xD
you are too hard on yourself. i thought you carried her quite well. i was more curious about your interpretation than to say "do it this way". personally i would think Inara and Jayne would be just as difficult for their own secrets and personalty quirks. the best of all, for me, would be to hear more about Book. now there was a story that was cute short far to quickly, but that is a tangent. don't worry about me i couldn't criticize you, i can write worth a damn so you are far more respected in my book for putting you neck out there.
Unedited version of chapter one can be found here: http://www.fireflyfans.net/sunroomitem.asp?i=21507 Will be uploaded to FF.net when my beta reader returns the final version to me~. EDIT: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4785996/2/Wings TADA~
o-o That was both irritating and unhelpful. OH WELL. Still gonna write it. Edit: Okay, seriously. I'm getting such bullshit responses from people on all the forums it has been posted in that I'm tired of it. If you don't like the god damn idea, don't fucking read it. If you don't have something constructive to say, shut the fuck up. Be helpful or get the hell out.