What are they? For texts I have Superfast Jellyfish and for phone calls I have Stylo, both by the Gorillaz.
Text msg is " Shut up women get on my horse " flash animation song and calls range from One Winged Angel to Starstrukk by 30H!3. For people I talk to a lot I give them ringtones that go with their personality. Normal ringtone is Hey Baby by Deadmua5 and Mellefresh
emails i used to have the worms "incoming", but someone deleted it from my works computer... Works mobile is "A Cinderella Story" by Mudvayne Personal Mobile is "Waster Years" by Devildriver. a) because they are good tracks b) no-one will ever have the same ones. Standard beep for messages though (not that annoying to people...) I always toy with the idea of giving my mum a special ringtone "Ding dong the Witch is Dead"...
I use "Bell 1" for calls, and vibrate for texts ;p you could say I haven't put much effort into the sound that will shortly annoy me.